Today is the 1st time after Ah Ma passed away, Mommy is making Bak Zhang. Being born in a traditional chinese family, we obeyed the tradition of no form of celebration allowed for 3 years after a member of the family passed on. According to Mommy, it is actually supposed to be 5 years but Ah Ma told her (before she passed on) 3 years will do.
This year, I don't know why, I told Mommy I really want to learn how to make bak zhang. I guess I just feel that it is about time I start learning how to cook, make or prepare my family dishes! Also because I want to spend more time with Mommy.
I have an absentee father which resulted in me being closer to my Mommy. Cant blame my father for he believe that working and bring income into the family is loving the family. Thank God, I have a Mommy who believe is showing love, care and concern to the family with her presence, understanding, support and encouragement. I love my Mommy. I constantly pray that the day will come where my father will know the importance of spending quality family time with his children and being there for them when they need him. I miss my father.
I've side-tracked. Bottom line, I want to spend moretime together with my parents before the leave this world. I want to learn as much as I can from my Mommy so that the next time I make the dish, I can remember the quality time we spent together. I am sure Mommy think of Ah Ma when we were busy in the kitchen. Especially when she tell me stories of she learned from Ah Ma. All these, they are priceless.
Thats why it is said that the best things in life needs to be felt.
Monday, June 14, 2010
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Blessings
Have you ever felt like you don't deserve what you have in life now? Have you ever wondered what you have done to deserve all that you have now? Have you ever wondered why do good things happen to you even when you do bad things at times?
I feel this way sometimes and whenever I do, I whisper to Daddy God: "Abba, thank you for your grace. I am blessed because of You love me." I am beginning to understand that it is not what I have that allowed me to receive His grace or His blessings. Rather, it is in the giver's joy that I am able to receive so abundantly. Thank God it is by His love I am blessed and not by the good I do. If that is the case, my life will be miserable.
Faith is having a good opinion of God. Faith is believing that Jesus have come to give us life and life more abundantly. This is my faith, this is what I believe in.
I am still struggling with some major decision making which will affect my life for at least the next 5 years. I have not come to a point where I can find the peace I long for in me. Or maybe I already have the decision in me but I am just waiting for the right timing to present itself.
Praying for myself and of course, all my loved ones.
P.S Lord, bless me with a good memory. Help me remember occasions and where I put my stuffs. It sucks to be left out of an occasion and the lamest of all is "I forgot". Slap me.
I feel this way sometimes and whenever I do, I whisper to Daddy God: "Abba, thank you for your grace. I am blessed because of You love me." I am beginning to understand that it is not what I have that allowed me to receive His grace or His blessings. Rather, it is in the giver's joy that I am able to receive so abundantly. Thank God it is by His love I am blessed and not by the good I do. If that is the case, my life will be miserable.
Faith is having a good opinion of God. Faith is believing that Jesus have come to give us life and life more abundantly. This is my faith, this is what I believe in.
I am still struggling with some major decision making which will affect my life for at least the next 5 years. I have not come to a point where I can find the peace I long for in me. Or maybe I already have the decision in me but I am just waiting for the right timing to present itself.
Praying for myself and of course, all my loved ones.
P.S Lord, bless me with a good memory. Help me remember occasions and where I put my stuffs. It sucks to be left out of an occasion and the lamest of all is "I forgot". Slap me.
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Radically Transformed
I am currently undergoing a radical transformation phrase of life.
There've been quite a lot of changes in my life. I am making many decisions, goal setting and weighting my priorities. Many questions kept popping in & out of my mind, like what I want to achieve, what I should do, how I can go about fulfilling it... etc.
Many of these questions goes un-answered. I've learnt over the past few months that I can plan all I want, some are detailed plans but peace was never with me because it was not what God wants for me. I was troubled and what I do did not prosper. It really sucks.
Everyday, I pray for favor, that Jesus will lead me to the right path and show me signs of confirmation. I pray that by His grace and only His grace, all friendship remain strong in this time when I am constantly absent in presence. I pray for strength to remain clear headed in this time of confusion. Amen.
All I can do now is I trust that Jesus will deliver me out of this phrase soon.
There've been quite a lot of changes in my life. I am making many decisions, goal setting and weighting my priorities. Many questions kept popping in & out of my mind, like what I want to achieve, what I should do, how I can go about fulfilling it... etc.
Many of these questions goes un-answered. I've learnt over the past few months that I can plan all I want, some are detailed plans but peace was never with me because it was not what God wants for me. I was troubled and what I do did not prosper. It really sucks.
Everyday, I pray for favor, that Jesus will lead me to the right path and show me signs of confirmation. I pray that by His grace and only His grace, all friendship remain strong in this time when I am constantly absent in presence. I pray for strength to remain clear headed in this time of confusion. Amen.
All I can do now is I trust that Jesus will deliver me out of this phrase soon.
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